Connor's Final Stand transcript

Scene 1: The Salt Lakes City Middle School courtyard
All Students: [Shouting And Laughing A Bit]

The scene cuts to Agnes Johnson's language arts classroom.

Matthew: [Gulps Nervously In Fear]

Matthew walks around in there and finds his Ace Savvy pencil box.

Matthew: "My Ace Savvy pencil box, I couldn't leave without this 1."

[Loud Stomping Sounds]

Matthew: "Oh no, not again!"

Matthew runs round the Salt Lakes City Middle School hallways in fear.

Noah (off screen): "Gurdle!"

Matthew: [In Fear] "N-N-N-Noah?"

Noah shows up in the Salt Lakes City Middle School hallways.

Noah: "Where do you think you’re going, Gurdle?!?"

Matthew: [In Fear] "I'm.........I'm……I'm getting outta here!"

Matthew runs around outta the Salt Lakes City Middle School building in fear.

Matthew: [Screaming In Fear]

Noah: "Get back here, you pathetic little dorkinator!"

All Students: [Gasping In Shock]

Wilbur: "Run away for your entire life, Matthew,"

Lila: "run away for your entire life!"

Edwin: "Keep running, Matthew,"

April: "keep running!"

Zach: "Run away for your entire life, Matthew!"

Matthew: [In Fear] "Dad, hurry, begin the motor!"

Matthew gets right into the blue moving van.

Matthew: "Step on it, Dad!"

Noah: "Get back here, Joker!"

Matthew: "So long, Noah, I’m moving far away and nobody knows where I'm going!"

Matthew: [Laughing Uncontrollably] "I'm free at last, free at last"

Noah: "Noooooooooooooooooooooo!"

Wilbur: "Well, you guys,"

Lila: "there goes Matthew."

Felix: "Man,"

Chloe: "he put up with being Noah's punching bag for an entire year,"

Felix: "that's gotta be a world record."

Brian: "Yesterday, Noah gave me and Joey Jr. atomic wedgies while outta school."

Kathy: "We know, Brian, we know."

Adam: "Yeah right, but you know exactly what that means-"

Daisy: "Noah's gonna be looking for a new victim!"

Wilbur and Lila: "Let’s all scatter!"

Wilbur, Lila, their cousins and classmates scatter in fear and hide in their hiding places.

Noah: "Come outta here, you little fraidy-cats, isn't 1 of you little maniacs brave enough to stand up to me?!? even 1 of you dorks?!?"

[Toilet Flushing]

Connor walks around outta the young men's washroom.

Connor: "Hey, where'd everybody go?"

Noah: "Hey, you!"

Connor: "Me?"

Noah: “What’s your name, young kid?'

Connor: [In Fear] "C-C-C-C-Connor G-G-G-G-G-Garrison, tough dude.”

Noah: "I don't like you, Garrison."

Connor: "Well, Noah, I bet you would if you got to know me better.”

Noah grabs Connor by his shoulders.

Connor: “Whooooooooooooa!”

Connor: "A lot of young kids and teens like me, well, maybe not a lot of them, but some of them like me.”

Noah takes Connor right over to the trash can and opens the trash can lid.

Connor: [In Fear] "No, please, Noah, don’t do this to me, I’m a real nice dude.”

Noah: "Oh, I'm not a nice dude, Garrison, I’m not a nice dude and I don’t like you, which means from now on, whenever I see your pale pasty face, I’m sticking to where it belongs (Noah stuffs Connor right into the empty trash can) right in here.”

Noah puts the trash can lid back on the empty trash can.

Noah: "Any questions, Garrison?"

Connor (from inside the empty trash can): "Uh, not right now, Noah"

Noah: "Good, see you tomorrow afternoon, trash dude."

Noah: [Chuckling Sinisterly]

Wilbur, Lila, Brian, Kathy, Edwin, April, Simon, Molly, Joey Jr., Julia, Bobby Jr., Jenna, Dean, Darla, Adam, Daisy, Jason and Shelly arrive.

Wilbur: “Connor,"

Lila: "are you alright?”

Connor: "I think so, you guys."

Julia: "Man, that Noah's such a jerk bait!"

Jason: "Yeah right,"

Shelly: "somebody oughta teach him a lesson!"

They all stare at Jason and Shelly.

Jason: "Oh, not us,"

Shelly: "but somebody."

Connor: "Oh, this is terrible and horrible, you guys, from now on, I'm gonna be picked on by the biggest meanest 8th grader on the school courtyard, it’s all 'cause I went to the young men's washroom at the wrong time."

Wilbur: "Look, Connor,"

Lila: "we say Noah doesn’t pick on other young kids when they're with their best friends for life and cousins."

Adam: "Wilbur and Lila are absolutely right,"

Daisy: "there’s a lot of safety in numbers."

Bobby Jr.: "Man, Connor,"

Jenna: "if we stay closer to you, you should be alright."

Connor: "Well, yeah right, you guys, but how close can you stick together as always?”

Meanwhile………

[Salt Lakes City Middle School Bell Ringing]

[Toilet Flushing Again]

Connor: "Hey look, I found a dolphin head quarter."

(Brief pause)

Connor: "Hey, wait just 1 minute, there's no such thing as a dolphin head quarter."

Noah's right hand grabs Connor's right shoulder.

Connor: [In Fear] “Uh oh, here we go again.”

Noah: "Hey, Garrison, do you know what time it is?"

Connor: [In Fear] "Uh, 2:47 PM?"

Noah: "No, Garrison, empty trash can time.”

Noah puts Connor right into another empty trash can.

Jason: "Connor,"

Shelly: "are you alright?"

Connor hangs his head down in fear.

Wilbur: "Look, Connor,"

Lila: "you gotta stick with all of us."

Connor: "Oh, it's no use, you guys, I can’t stick around with any of you every single minute in my entire life, I’m doomed, doomed, doomed."

Julia: "Oh yeah?!? well I say you cream the jerk bait!”

Joey Jr.: "Yeah right, Connor couldn't even cream corn."

Brian: "Well, Connor, you can always tell a teacher or a principal."

Adam: "Yeah right, in the hands of a mature grownup,"

Daisy: "the entire situation can be resolved with complete desgression indelgicy."

Meanwhile with George Terwilliger, Noah, Connor and another student……

George Terwillger: "Noah, what on earth do you think you're doing?!?"

Noah: "Nothing, Principal Terwilliger."

George Terwilliger: "Yeah right, but let me tell you something, young man, if I ever catch you bothering this student or any other student on the school courtyard, I’ll haul your behind down to my office faster than you can say detention, you got it?!?"

Noah: "Yes, Principal Terwilliger, I got it."

Principal Terwilliger: "Good point."

Principal Terwilliger leaves to go back in his office.

Noah tosses Connor right back into the empty trash can.

Noah: "And if you ever tell a teacher or school principal on me again, I'll pound on you so hard, your shoulder blades will hurt.”

The other cousins and best friends for life arrive and get Connor outta the empty trash can.

Agnes Johnson's language arts classroom
[Salt Lakes City Middle School Bell Ringing Again]

All Students: [Cheering Wildly]

Wilbur: "Aren’t you coming along, Connor?"

Connor: "I’ll catch up with you guys later, I got a reline in the goldfish bowl."

Lila: "Connor, it’s alright to be terrified of Noah,"

Edwin: "heck yeah,"

April: "we're all terrified of him."

Connor: "Yeah right, but he's not picking on you guys, he’s picking on me, and if I go out there, it’s gonna be empty trash can time."

Brian: "Unless of course you went out there,"

Kathy: "but Noah couldn't possibly see you."

Connor: "Uh, what exactly do you mean by that, you guys?"

Back outside the Salt Lakes City Middle School courtyard
Noah: "Where’s that pathetic little dorkinator?"

Robotic Voice: "Edwin, April, Jeffrey, little elderly man playing tether ball."

Noah: "Little elderly man playing tether ball."

Noah walks right over to Connor who's disguised as a little elderly man playing tether ball.

Connor/Little Elderly Man: "Oh, uh, don't mind me, I'm just a little elderly man, a little elderly man who plays tether ball."

Noah tosses Connor/the little elderly man right into the empty trash can once again.

Connor/Little Elderly Man: "Uh, a little bit of help here?"

Meanwhile again.......

Connor: "Maybe I can get some plastic surgery or see if my dad can get transferred here again, I wonder if Noah could find me a bank off.”

Julia: "Oh for corn sakes, Connor, I was telling you all along, there’s only 1 way to deal with a school bully, Connor, fight back!"

Connor: [In Fear] "Fight back? but, Julia, it'll destroy me."

Julia: "Well, maybe he will and maybe he won’t, but let me tell you something, Connor, the only reason Noah's picking on you is just 'cause you're terrified, wild beasts like Noah can smell fear and they feed on it, I say fight back!"

Joey Jr.: "No, Connor, don't do it, violence isn't the answer, it's never the answer, violence would only get more violent!"

Julia: "Don’t listen to him, Connor, fight the big tough idiot!"

Joey Jr.: "No, be peaceful!"

Julia: "Fight back!"

Joey Jr.: "Be peaceful!"

Julia: "Fight back!"

Joey Jr.: "BE PEACEFUL!!!"

Connor: "STOOOOOOOOOOP!"

Connor: "I really appreciate what you guys are trying to say, but this is something I gotta figure out for myself."

Connor walks away from the other students.

The Loud-Santiago-Casagrande-McBride Apartment/Connor and Felicia's bedroom
[Thinking]: [Julia's Voice] "Fight back, fight back."

[Thinking]: [Joey Jr.'s Voice] "Be peaceful, be peaceful, be peaceful."

Connor's Blue Action Trooper's action figure head transforms into Noah's head.

Noah: "I don’t like you, Garrison, and I’ll pick on you from now on."

The head of Connor's toy supersonic jet plane transforms into Noah's head as well.

Noah: "From now on."

Connor's pet garter snake's head transforms into Noah’s head as well.

Noah: “From now on!”

Connor: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Connor runs away in fear.

[Knocking On Door]

Francisco: "Come in, Connor."

Connor enters Francisco's work room.

Connor: "Uh, Dad?"

Francisco: "Yes, Connor?"

Connor: "Can I ask you 1 single question?"

Francisco: "Of course you can, Connor."

Connor: “Uh, well, see? there’s this little country that hasn't done anything to anybody and there’s this big country and it begins picking on it for no reason, what should that little country do? fight or run away and never go to school again? I mean, go to the United States army."

Francisco: "Connor, let me tell you a little story called World War I."

Francisco (telling the story): You see, once upon a time, there was a big country called Germany who liked to pick on little countries like Poland and Luckhsinberg and none of the other big countries would do anything to stop it, then 1 day Germany attacked the weak little country called Belgium, but little Belgium stood up to big Germany and fought, all of the other big countries couldn’t believe this.

Connor: [Gasps in Amazement] "Wow, super thrilling."

Francisco: "You see, Connor, just 'cause a country's out numbered or out gunned, doesn’t mean they don't have a chance, they went back down to the battle of the bulge."

Connor: "Uh, no?"

Francisco: "You bet they did, Connor, we don't back down to bullying, if we did, they would walk all over us, battle fights may have lost the road to victory, Connor, but we always keep fighting 'til we won the battle fight."

Connor: "Wow, Dad, thanks a bunch, wow, who would’ve thought about little Belgium winning over big Germany?"

Francisco: "Winning? [Chuckles A Bit] they got the stuffing kicked outta them."

The door closes on Connor.

Back on the Salt Lakes City Middle School courtyard once again
[Salt Lakes City Middle School Bell Ringing]

All Students: [Cheering Wildly]

April: "I can’t believe Connor didn’t show up for school today."

Edwin: "That poor dude, he's probably half across to New Jersey by now."

Wilbur: "Hey, you guys,"

Lila: "look over there!"

Connor walks right over to his cousins and best friends for life.

Wilbur: "Connor,"

Lila: "are you alright?"

Brian: "where are you going?"

Connor: "I'm going to the tether ball court."

Kathy: "But, Connor, Noah's over there, he'll squish you like an insect."

Connor: "Well, you guys, maybe he will and maybe he won’t, but I’m Belgium, and Belgium wants to play tether ball."

The scene cuts to Noah who's punching a blue tether ball.

[Tether Ball Explodes]

Noah: [Laughing Sinisterly]

Connor walks around bravely over to Noah.

Noah: "Garrison, I thought you were staying at home today, what is it? empty trash can time already?"

Connor: "Sorry, Noah, but there’s not gonna be an empty trash can time, not today, not ever, from now on, you're leaving me alone for good!"

Noah: "What the crud?"

Connor: "You heard me, Noah, you can't pick on me any longer, it's over!"

All Students: [Gasping In Shock]

Noah: "You mean you're actually standing up to me? nobody's had the courage and bravery to stand up to me before."

Connor: "Does that mean you're not gonna pick on me any longer?"

Noah: "No, Garrison, it means nobody's ever stood up to me before, now stand still so I can pound the living day lights outta you."

Connor: "Wait 1 single minute."

Connor gets out his blue punching gloves.

Connor: "Alright, Noah, let’s go!"

Noah: [Battle Cry] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Connor: "Ow, ouch, yow!"

All Students: [Gasping In Shock]

Connor: "Whooooooooa!”

Connor lands right in front of Wilbur and Lila.

Connor: "I'm alright, you guys."

Wilbur: "Alright, Connor, you proved your point,"

Lila: "just fall back."

Julia: "Yeah right, I was wrong,"

Joey Jr.: "just take the fall back, will you?"

Connor: "No way, you guys, you see, I figured it out, the worse he can do is beat me up, right after he's done that, there's nothing to be terrified of any longer.”

Connor goes over to fight against Noah again.

Connor: "Ow, ouch, yow!"

Chloe: "That’s the bravest thing I saw in my entire life."

Connor: "Ow, ouch, yow, whoa!"

Noah: "Say goodnight, Garrison, it’s beddy bye time."

Wilbur and Lila put a stop to it.

Wilbur: "That's quite enough, Noah,"

Lila: "we're stopping this right now!"

Noah: "Oh yeah, Louds? you and what army?"

Julia: "This army, Noah!"

Noah: "Ha, don't make me laugh my head off, I'll pound the living daylights outta all of you!"

Adam: "Then you need to pound on all of us too,"

Daisy: "and all of us too,"

Brian: "and all of us,"

Kathy: "and all of us,"

Simon: “and all of us,”

Molly: “and all of us,”

All Salt Lakes City Middle School students: "And all of us!"

Noah: "Oh yeah? well, I'll just…I'll just……oh, forget about it, this is getting too pathetic!"

All Students: [Cheering Wildly Again]

Wilbur: "You did it, Connor,"

Lila: "you stood up to Noah!"

Connor: "I did?"

Adam: "You most certainly did,"

Daisy: "and right now the battle fight's over,"

Jenna: "For all of us."

Jason: "Connor,"

Shelly: "how's it feeling?"

Connor: "Super good, you guys, (April touches Connor's right shoulder.) ow, for the most part of it."

All Students: [Cheering Wildly Again]

All Students: "Connor, Connor, Connor, Connor, Connor!"

The Garrison's green sports car pulls up the drive way.

Lynn: "You really told him what?!?"

Francisco: "Well, I just thought, well, it was a history discussion, you know-"

Connor walks right over to Lynn and Francisco.

Lynn: "Connor, are you injured, honey pie?"

Connor: "Not bad, Mom, I'm pretty sure I’ll be able to see through my right eye by tomorrow morning, but I guess I lost the battle fight, Dad."

Francisco: "Well, Connor, it looks like you won the battle fight, come on, we'll buy Belgium and the rest of us some ice cream sandwiches.”

All Students: [Cheering Wildly Once Again]

Fade to a black screen…………